She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
