Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
