I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
