I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
It's shark week go big or go home
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
