Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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