After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
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