thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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