Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
