I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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