wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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