So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize