may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
