That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
