White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
