good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
