Nicole vs. Life
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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