im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
