Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
