i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
