New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
