So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
