butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
