I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize