I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
