it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
