someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
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