How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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