I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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