69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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