with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Randomize
