Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
