I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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