walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Fuck me I smell like cheese
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
