Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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