A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I can text with my tongue
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
