Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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