thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
