...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
