I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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