Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
All the doctor said was why
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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