At least make sure they are 18
Why
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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