this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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