yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize