3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
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