WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
