Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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