you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
