How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
