yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
