I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
he's single and there are thong briefs.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
